After years of being on facebook, I took a social risk and exited the facebook scene for 30 days. 30 days is a long time in todays modern world.
Here are the most common questions I received during this journey.
Why did I do it?
Looking back at my experience it's hard to remember all the details why, but I'll try. It's complex and honestly, I don't fully understand it, but I felt this tug in my heart telling me that it was time and overdue.
I think part of it was that I don't like being addicted to anything man-made or manufactured. Actually, I'm not a fan of any kind of addiction. Honestly though, I never thought of FB as an addiction. It's always been a simple something that just existed. But, for something that just existed, I looked at it nearly everyday. It was favorited on all my browsers. I looked at work, home, and on my phone. I liked seeing a red box on my facebook. I liked thumbs ups and comments. I liked to give thumbs ups and comments. But somehow it didn't feel right. I wanted to see why.
Another part was that I found that there are some awesome people who bug the smack out of me on facebook - (how's that for honesty). I can't explain this. Maybe it's that some people present themselves better in real life than in text format. I really don't know, but I do know that I like most people better in real life than when they try to express their life through a text or 140 characters. This is not so much about anyone else as it is about me. I didn't like the way I felt inside after reading some people's posts. No offense to anyone, but sometimes I would read posts and be in a bad mood afterward. I didn't like that.
Besides being annoyed by others, I was also at times annoyed with myself. I thought, "If I think some people are annoying on facebook, then I am probably just as annoying to someone else." Who wants to be that? Nobody does. I actually want to be a guy that people enjoy and don't want to tarnish that on facebook.
There was also a piece of me that wanted to engage in face to face relationships in a more intentional way. For me facebook could easily supplement my desire to be intentional with the relationships closest to me.
I also wanted to learn how to listen again. Because facebook is always happening it, for me, it became distracting. My wife would want to talk and so she'd start talking. About 3 minutes into pouring her heart out, I'd look up from the computer and go, "what was that honey?" Let's just say that never goes over well! Life is full of distractions and facebook (along with other things) add to the distractions of being able to be fully present where you are and who you are with.
What was the point where I didn't miss facebook?
After 10 days in, it became very easy to live a life free of distraction and newsfeeds. I have to admit that I liked the freedom. I liked reminding myself that life is about choices. And that everyday is a choice to live in a way that is either more abundant than the last or less abundant than the last. Being without facebook felt healthy. It was like a breath of fresh air or hanging upside down just to see the world from a different angle. It was good!
30 days flew by in a heartbeat.
What was the hardest part about being away from facebook?
My cousin had a son and I wanted to comment on his page and my wife and I celebrated our five year anniversary and I wanted to shout that milestone from the rooftops!
I also missed feedback. I missed opinions on decisions I was making. I had to rely on "reviews" from amazon, google, yelp, etc...
What was the best part about not being on facebook?
I became more aware of the people that are around me. I did listen more. I did big things that actually matter - like learn how to fix my car myself. I read 5 books. I wrote blog posts for other people's blogs. I emceed more events. I simply did things. Things I like to do. It was cool.
What would I have done differently?
I would have made my break a full on computer break. No computers of any kind for 30 days..It's not practical, I know, but wouldn't it be cool to see what the world would look like without a computer in your hand or in front of your face at nearly all moments of the day?
A buddy of mine, who works for a cell phone company, actually decided to get rid of his smartphone for a year. He's using a plain-jane cell phone. Now that's kind of cool.
Why am I back on Facebook?
Great question. I found many more benefits being off facebook than I found negatives/drawbacks during my journey. But, like most tools, I try not to blame them as much as I do the person using it. In this case it is me. After breaking the cycle, my hope is to not be on facebook much - maybe 3 times a week.
My next post will be 10 things I learned by taking a facebook hibernation....
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